Mostly I am just writing this to get it off my chest. Not for sympathy or advice. Just because I need to get it out. And it might get random. Okay it will most likely get random, but I just need to get my thoughts out...
So here we go.. no edits...
I hate letting my sweet baby sit in her crib and cry. It is torture.
I know the second I go in there and pick her up that she will stop. I know that she just wants to be with me... that's all.. just some company. That shouldn't be too much to ask, right?
I know that as soon as I love on her a little and snuggle up to her that she will look at me and smile that gummy-smile, despite the fact that I have seemingly abandoned her for the last 20 minutes.
But I also know she is a little girl who is busy growing and she needs a dang nap! But isn't there a better way than letting her just cry it out?! It makes me want to cry when I hear her screaming... and all the fuss over a silly nap.
But... if I give in and go pick her up then am I a bad mom for being inconsistent? Or letting her win the power struggle? Or for not sticking to the schedule?? Will I pay for it later when she hits two?? Which I know is coming all-too-soon since every single parent I see tells me that they grow up too fast...
And all of this gets me thinking about Heavenly Father and how terrible it must be for Him to see us struggle... His children.
It only makes sense to me that there must be times when He wants to just eliminate the pain, the hurt, the struggle, the trial... but, He knows that it will be for our good--that the struggle is what will help us learn.
It makes me grateful for Christ who understands all that we go through in these moments of trial and despair. That He is there with open arms just waiting for us to come to Him, to confide in Him...
Like I said... lots of random thoughts...
All I'm saying is the girl needs a nap, but I don't know why it has to be so so so hard...
